


Never Wanted to Leave

by AbsinthexMind



Series: Oh brother where art thou [53]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Affairs, Aftermath, Brother/Sister Incest, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Cleaning, Cousins, Death, Discovery, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Illegitimacy, Incest, Parent-Child Relationship, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:20:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22367824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbsinthexMind/pseuds/AbsinthexMind
Summary: Months after Tony's sacrifice, Pepper finally brings up the strength to start cleaning out his lab. Only. . . she finds more than what she had anticipated. Secret memories and forbidden arguments.
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Reader, Tony Stark/Reader
Series: Oh brother where art thou [53]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/501493
Comments: 8
Kudos: 196





	1. Chapter 1

Pepper ran her fingers along Tony’s workbench. His tools still laid askew as if he were going to come back in a few minutes. The fact was, Tony was never coming back. Not this time. A truth Pepper had to live with. 

Dust was collecting on her fingertips. Two months. Two months since tony died to save the earth. Two months since she had the nerve to venture into Tony’s workspace. Everything was as he had left it. Picture perfect. It had to be done. It was time to clean it out. She couldn’t keep ignoring it. The work room was a gaping reminder. Her and Morgan were moving back to the city anyway. Cleaning it out now would save her grief later. She would save some things of course, perhaps Morgan would gain Tony’s apt for science and engineering when she was older. For now, Pepper would pack them away. Out of sight, out of mind. 

Releasing a shaky sigh, Pepper blinks way the tears that were pricking at her eyes. The past two months hadn’t been easy. For anyone. Especially for Tony’s sister (y/n). Oh how she screamed and wailed; inconsolable. Her brother. . . the brother she had loved so much was gone. Not even her husband Steve could do anything to comfort her. A piece of her had been taken. Tony and (y/n) had been close. So much so that when she gave birth to Captain America’s son, Tony was the first to hold him. Pepper still remembers the blinding joy that swept over him. Never had she seen him that happy then when he held his newborn nephew. 

(y/n) still wasn’t the same. None of them were. 

Cardboard box in her arms, she begins to carefully place items inside of it. So many memories of Tony and Morgan hanging out in there. Full of laughs, especially when (y/n) and Cassius would come to visit. Cass and Morgan were thick as thieves. 

Accidentally, Pepper bumps into a metal box that had been placed too close to the edge. Falling to the floor with a metallic ring, Pepper hopes it wasn’t anything important as she picks it back up and examines. A bulb on top was blinking, a holographic stream of light shoots out. The image crackles but the audio comes out clearly. 

_“There she is!”_

Her heart splinters at Tony’s voice, now holding the box delicately in her hands. 

The image clears to reveal a younger (y/n), tinkering away in Tony’s old Malibu lab. Large goggles are propped on her face as she looks up. 

She rolls her eyes. _“Bored again, I see?”_ Her youthful face was already starting to show signs of weariness. Far too young to have already experienced such hardships. Still, there was that playfulness that only youths seemed to have. 

The scene is closed in on (y/n)’s hands at work. _“And can you tell your audience what you’re making today?”_ It shifts back up to (y/n) smiling. 

_“Missile launchers for your new suit.”_ Grinning cheekily at her brother. 

The camera turns to face a very close Tony and that charming smile of his that made Pepper’s heart break all over again. The image was so clear, so perfect that Pepper half thought if she reached her hand out she could feel Tony again. Fed the rough, coarseness of his facial hair with her fingertips one last time. 

But her hand went through the hologram, meeting nothing as empty air kissed her digits. _“There you have it folks. (y/n) Stark bettering not only Iron Man, but the world.”_

(y/n)’s giggle is heard off camera. 

Hologram flashing for a moment, another scene beams. 

Entranced now, Pepper sets aside her task to watch the unseen scenes of Tony’s personal life. 

This scene looked to be taken from the inside of the Iron Man helmet. 

_“Hey. Hey it’s okay now!”_ A red, metal hand cups the cheek of a crying (y/n). Her (h/c) hair was a mess, (e/c) eyes wide with adrenaline. _“(y/n), just breathe. Breathe for me, sweetie.”_

Tony had always spoken to (y/n) so sweetly. Filled with honey and devotion. Yes, Tony was still a sarcastic bastard, even with his sister. Even when he was, (y/n) had a quick response on the tip of her tongue. They were siblings after all. They’re affection for one another always surprised Pepper. 

Clinging to her brother, she swallowed and tried to take a deep breath. She was so panicked though. Obviously afraid of what she had just been through. 

Pepper could feel her terror as (y/n)’s gaze finally returns to her brother. A star’s shine reflecting in her watery eyes. 

_“I got you now.”_ Tony reassured her. 

Bottom lip quivering, (y/n) hugs her brother. 

From terrified to sleeping, (y/n) is now curled up in bed. Serenity and peace softening her features. Such a sweet moment to capture. Tony truly loved his sister above all others in the world, possibly including Pepper herself. There was something in that scene though, something so incredibly personal that Pepper felt like she shouldn’t be intruding. Tony meant for no one else to see this but himself. 

_“I love you. . .”_ Tenderness in his tone as he keeps the camera on his sister. 

_“Stop it Tony!”_ (y/n)’s angry voice brings in the next scene. Tony’s lab is her background and this time Tony is next to her on the screen. Equally livid as he’s trying to contain himself. Everything about his body language screamed anger. 

_“Tony-”_

_“No. No god damn way.”_

Fierceness makes (y/n) hard as she stands up to her big brother. _“I’m going to be with him. With or without your permission.”_

Jaw clenched, Tony’s arms tremble. _“What about me, (y/n). What about us?! How could you do this to me?!”_

Pepper had no idea what they were talking about. This was a part of their life that Pepper was evidently not allowed in. Heat crept up on the back of her neck, stomach starting to twist uncomfortably. Something wasn’t right. Whatever Pepper was peeking in on, it wasn’t meant for anyone to witness. 

Eyes glittering with unshed tears, (y/n) laughed bitterly. _“You’re still ever the narcissist after all this time. You were the one that was so worried about anyone finding out about us! This is for the best. I have to be with someone that isn’t my brother.”_

Suddenly Pepper felt clammy. No. . . 

(y/n)’s hand goes to her stomach. _“And he’s the father of this baby.”_

Pepper’s whole entire world was tilting sideways. 

His fury could be felt, feared, even through the hologram as he took a step forward. Defensively, (y/n) took a step back in turn. _“It could be mine.”_

_“Don’t do this Tony. Please-”_ (y/n) begged, imploring to the brother she loved; not this jealous monster that Pepper was seeing for the first time. 

_“That baby inside of you that you think belongs to the perfect Captain America could be MINE!”_

A sickness crashed into Pepper. Hands trembling, she grabs at the small cube and smashes it against the edge of the steel table. Smashing it until it was rendered to hundreds of small pieces. Chest heaving, no matter how much she gasped there just wasn’t enough air to replenish her lungs. 

She should’ve seen it. There were so many signs but she just waved it off as them being affectionate siblings. 

A fool. 

So stupid. 

And Cass. . . 

“Mom?” Morgan’s voice is enough to give her a panic attack. “Are you okay?” She stood in the doorway of the lab, brows knitted with concern. Pepper knew that she probably looked a mess among the broken parts of Tony’s invention. 

Taking a steadying breath, she nods slowly. “Yeah. . . Mommy is fine.” It was far from the truth. Morgan was too young for this. 

On light feet, Morgan makes her way to her mom and gently sits next to her. She glances at the mess on the floor then back to her mom’s red face. “I miss daddy too. A lot. I miss him so much that sometimes I get angry.” 

Letting out a whisper of a chuckle, Pepper wipes at her eyes. That had been a majority of her relationship with Tony. Tony not doing his work, not listening to her when she told him something was dangerous, continuously putting his life on the line. And now this. Anger didn’t quite fit what she was feeling at that moment. Perhaps she was angry that the two Stark siblings kept something like this a secret. Fear ran deeper though. Fear, confusion, dismay, hurt sounded more accurate. 

“Are we still going to Aunt (y/n)’s house?” Morgan speaks up after a moment. 

She wanted to tell her no. That they wouldn’t be going to (y/n)’s house for quite some time. Pepper couldn’t deny Morgan her aunt and cousin. (y/n) was Morgan’s last extension of her father. And Cass was her friend. They were family. 

Lips dry, Pepper sniffles and nods. “Yes. Just give mommy a second.   
  
  


A little ways out of the city would offer Pepper fresh air. With Steve having handed over the job of Captain America to Sam Wilson, they had decided raising Cassius out of the city would be for the best. A nice simple life, like Steve had always wanted. An all-American lifestyle. After all that he had done for the world, Steve definitely deserved this happy ending. 

Pepper’s heart thumped dully. Or so Steve had thought. The reality was crueler. The little boy he believed to be his son may have very well belonged to someone else. 

The sight of the Roger’s home made Morgan perk up a little, light returning to her eyes as she unbuckled herself and threw open the car door. She sprinted up the driveway and to the porch, enthusiastically ringing the doorbell. 

Swallowing all bitter thoughts, Pepper slowly follows after her daughter. By the time she reacted the front door, Steve was already opening it. 

His face blooms. “Hey Morgan. Cass is in the pool out back.” He stepped aside to let her pass into the house. Steve chuckles and turns back to Pepper, expression falling. “Are you okay, Pepper?” 

Sweet. Too sweet. How could they do this to him? 

“I’m just feeling a little lightheaded. . .” she replied while feeling her throat constrict. 

“Then come inside and rest for a bit.” Steve offered. “(y/n) is out back with the kids so you can relax.” 

Not lying when she had told Steve she was light-headed, Pepper nodded and let the super soldier lead her into his house. Inhaling she immediately smelled Tony. This was his scent. 

Steve noticed her hesitation, the moving of her nostrils. “Sorry about the smell. . . (y/n) insists on spritzing the house with Tony’s cologne. I don’t have the heart to tell her to stop. It helps her move along with her grief. She’s opening up more but its going to be a while.” 

“I do that sometimes.” Pepper admits softly. “Spray a little bit on my pillow before I go to sleep. . .” 

On the couch, Pepper plops herself down; eyes scanning over the numerous pictures they had in the living room. Mainly of Cass. Cass and Steve, Cass and (y/n), Cass and Morgan, Cass and Tony. . . 

Pepper picks up the one of Cass and Tony, a picture she had seen so many times. The same picture had been in their own house. She saw it differently now. Picked apart their facial similarities. Cass looked too much like his mother. Big (e/c) eyes and a doll-like face. The only thing she saw that belonged to Tony was his smile. 

“Steve. . . Do you mind grabbing (y/n)? I have to talk to her about something.” 

“Sure, no problem.” 

Pepper listened to his footsteps fade. She needed a straightforward answer to all of this. Otherwise this secret would drive her insane. These two people Pepper thought she knew so well had deceived everyone. 

“Hey Pep. You should’ve come to join us in the back.” (y/n) smiles, two glasses of wine in her hands, she offers one to Pepper. 

Willing her hand to steady, she wraps her fingers around the thin stem of the glass. “Thank you.” 

(y/n) takes a seat in an armchair and sighs into it, movement so fluid that the wine in her glass didn’t even slosh. “You had something you wanted to talk to me about?” 

“Were you and Tony in an incestual relationship?” 

Her wine glass immediately falls from her hands and onto the floor. “I. . . I-I’m sorry?” 

“No games (y/n).” Pepper kept her eyes trained on (y/n). “I found something while I was cleaning out Tony’s lab. Just. . . please be honest with me. 

Conflict darkened (y/n)’s face as she chewed on her bottom lip. Everything inside of her was fighting to keep quiet, Pepper could see that. It was a secret she had harbored for so long. “Please don’t think badly of us.” 

A whisper it may have been, but it was loud and clear to Pepper. 

(y/n) focuses on her fingers. “We both wanted to end it so many times because we knew it was wrong. But. . . We loved each other so much.” Her head shakes slowly from side to side. 

Silence basked them like the sun, finally calming down Pepper’s heart rate. There was a sort of calm that the truth brought to her. 

“I stopped it a little after I got together with Steve.” She admitted and Pepper is reminded of another issue. 

“Cassius.” The question was in her voice prompting (y/n) to finally lift her head. 

Her cheeks flush with indignation. 

“Mom!!” 

“Hey! I told you mommy was busy!” 

Both women jerked. 

In came running Cassius, still dripping from his time in the pool. Morgan was right behind him, CapriSun in hand. 

(y/n) groans. “Cass, you’re dripping all over the floor.” 

“Sorry!” Steve came in apologizing profusely. He throws a squealing Cass over his shoulder, doing the same with a giggling Morgan. The kids scream gleefully for Steve to put them down as they retreat back to the pool. 

Pepper stands up and (y/n) pleads with her sister-in-law, panic in her voice. There wasn’t any need of it though. Pepper goes over to (y/n) and holds her hands. “It was wrong of me to ask you that. I’m sorry.” In the end it didn’t really matter. If Tony was Cass’ biological dad, it didn’t matter. Steve was Cass’ one true dad. 

Tears spring up as (y/n) grips onto Pepper’s hands. She wipes (y/n)’s tears away and pulls her up into a hug. Maybe (y/n) didn’t know either. Maybe she was too scared to find out. 

It didn’t matter. They were still family no matter what.


	2. <Prologue>Whispers of the Heart

“Uncle Tony!” Cass jumped for joy at the sight of his one and only uncle. He immediately set aside his legos on the living room to scamper over to Tony. 

Tony kneels down to capture Cass in his arms. “Hey squirt!” 

Wrapping his little arms around Tony’s neck, it appeared at first that he would never let go. 

Heart warm and smiling, you just stay behind and look at them. Your brother and your son. Nothing made you happier than when the two were together. Tony t0ok his role as uncle incredibly seriously. So different from how he acted when he first found out you were pregnant. Absolute fury, the utter betrayal that had been in his eyes when you claimed it to be Steve’s. So much had happened since then, neither you or Tony speaking of that confrontation. That didn’t matter anymore. Of course every so often you would wonder who Cass’ biological father truly was. Fear gripping you at the thought that it could be your brother. It was easy to see it now as Tony held him. 

Pulling away a bit, Cass finally realizes that his cousin was missing. “Where’s Morgan?” 

Tony scoffs. “Aren’t I enough?” 

You roll your eyes and finally join the two. “Still have to be the center of attention.” 

He looks over his shoulder, Cass still in his arms. “Damn right. Especially with my nephew. I want to be his favorite person.” 

“Keep dreaming.” You sit down on the floor with them. “I’m his mother. I carried him inside of me for nine months. It’s obvious that I’m his favorite.” 

“You’re both wrong!” Your son squeals and wiggles his way out of Tony’s embrace. At that moment he looked so much like Tony when he was that age that it scared you. “Papa is my favorite! He was Captain America after all!” 

You noticed the obvious sting on Tony’s face at Cass’ confession. Perhaps Tony still entertained the thought that there was a small chance that Cassius was his son. There was still resentment against Steve, not just because he wooed you; it went back to the whole situation with Bucky Barnes. Tony saw it as a betrayal, that Steve had forsaken the Avengers. Even now they hardly spoke. There was still so much bitterness. Thanos did nothing to reunite them. After the Snap, Tony pretty much sequestered himself in his new home that was cuddled in the safety of the woods. 

Now he only came around when he was certain Steve wasn’t home. 

Not realizing the hurt he had caused his uncle, Cass tugs at Tony’s hand. “Play legos with me!” 

“Legos huh?” Tony obediently follows his nephew while you crawl after them. Cass had been in the middle of making what looked like an airplane with mismatched lego colors. 

“Yeah! Papa told me in World War Two they used planes to fight against the bad guys.” 

“An air fight.” You reminded him with a nod. 

Cass smiles enthusiastically. “I wanna do one with my legos.” 

“Cass, no. You already did that and remember the mess you made?” Pointing to the various pieces scattered all over the floor. 

He just out his bottom lip. “But Uncle Tony is here! I promise I’ll clean it up later.” 

“Yeah mom. Don’t be a buzz kill.” Tony says while picking up a few lego bricks and putting them together. With that meticulous brain of his, Tony begins assembling his own fighter plane. 

You eye your brother and your son. “You’re gonna regret those words Tony.” 

Face brightening, Cass happily starts grabbing legos while Tony winks at you. “Lets see what you got.” 

“Someone seems to have forgotten that I’m as smart as you.” Grinning, the construction of battle planes had begun.   
  


The battle had been epic considering that Tony and Cass had ganged up on you so you hat to make another plane. Brightly colored legos flew this way and that as they collided. One hit you in the neck but you hardly noticed as another hit Tony in the eye. A mess you did make, but you weren’t concerned. The three of you were having fun and laughing. WAs this what life would have been had Tony raised Cass? If you had accepted him as the father, your life could be like this every day. It was wishful thinking. Tony could never be acknowledged as Cass’ dad, even if he really was. There could be no evidence of your once incestual relationship with your brothr. Absolutely no one was to know. Even though half of earth’s population was gone, Tony was still well known. If word ever got out about it, you were sure it would ruin everything for him. He was finally in a good place. Finally at peace with himself. You didn’t want to take that away from him. The past belonged in the past; the two of you having moved on. There were moments between you and Tony though. Moments that you couldn’t ignore. Tony glancing at you when he thought you weren’t looking. Brown eyes filled to the brim with longing. Conflicted due to his genuine love for Pepper. For he truly did love the mother of his daughter. When he thought he couldn’t love anyone else, there was Pepper. Pepper who was there when you couldn’t be. She gave him a beautiful daughter that changed his life. 

“Why do you look sad?” Cass asked with a mouthful of mac and cheese. Tony was sitting next to him at the table, shoving his own serving into his mouth. You hadn’t touched your’s yet as you were stuck in your own thoughts. 

Internally you scold yourself for allowing your child to see you sad. “I’m just sad that you and Uncle Tony won.” 

Cass put down his spoon. “It’s okay. Next time we’ll let you win.” 

You chuckle and nod. “Okay.” 

Big (e/c) eyes turn to look at the clock in the kitchen. “Papa will be home soon! All four of us can play legos!” 

Finishing off his food, Tony gets up. “Maybe next time. I have to get going.” 

“Aw!” complained Cass. “You’re never around when papa is home. Don’t you like him?” 

“Cass, enough.” In a warning tone, you watch your son pout. Returning your attention on your brother, you ask “Can’t you stay and talk to him? At least say hello.” 

Tony purses his lips, contemplating for a moment before shaking his head. “Sorry. I’m still not ready to talk to the Boy Scout.” 

At that, Cassius slumps in his seat and stares at his almost finished bowl of mac and cheese. 

Sighing you get up. “Come on Cass. Lets walk Uncle Tony to the door.” 

Sullen, Cass follows you and Tony to the front door with his head hanging low. 

Patting him on the head Tony promises that he would come back and visit again as soon as he could. His words did nothing to cheer up Cass though as he concentrates on his socked feet. Tony knew that he had upset Cass greatly but he couldn’t forgive Steve so easily. There had been too much damage caused between them. You and Pepper had tried to mend it to no avail. It would have to happen on their own time. 

“Tell Nat and the others I said ‘hi’.” He said before turning his back to you and to the driveway where his car was parked. He had a long drive back to Pepper and Morgan. Sometimes you couldn’t help the jealousy that crept up your neck. It was fleeting, but you still had to squash it as soon as possible unless you wanted it to fester inside of you. Cass held onto your hand as Tony drove away. 

_Stop_

_Come back_

_Don’t go_

The whispers of your heart were so quiet that even you barely heard them.


End file.
